"Gusto mo pumayat ng mabilis Becks?" i asked my friend, " mag exercise ka kasi, wala ka masyadong activity e kundi kumain lalo na pag depressed", defensively she retorted, " active naman ako a, atsaka nag e exercise ako atleast once a week", i snapped back, " Tsk, Becks, hindi exercise yung pag switch ng TV channels manually". (^_^)
I received a call from Becky, " Moshi Moshi! " i answered the call, " Jet! celebrate tayo! nag lose ako ng 5lbs, pumapayat na ko! labas naman tayo", she cheerfully said, " tigilan mo na yang drugs, san naman tayo punta?" i teased, " tadu, nagda diet ako! punta tayo sa hindi ko pa napupuntahan" she said. " sige wait, punta tayo sa kitchen nyo kain tayo ng madami to celebrate" (^_^)
"Love is a mystery talaga you know?", Becky said while we were having lunch at the school canteen, " bat naman?" i asked, " simplify mo lang, parang sintas ng sapatos yan, it takes two strings to knot and get attached, and just one string to pull out", "nice quote friend! san mo naman nakuha yan?" she asked, "kay Mr. Quickie" (^_^)
"Oy Jet!, bakit ka nanaman sad? ang aga aga pa ganyan ka na", Becky said one school morning, " Eh kase naman, yung GF ko di ko daw siya iniintindi, at pinapakinggan," i sadly quipped, " Baket nga ba ganyan kayo mga boys?" di totoo yun ah!" i said, " di ko lang matandaan yung mga sinasabi nya." (^_^)
Remember the "when i grow up i want to be a________ back in grade school?", Everybody wants to be a doctor, an engineer, a pilot, a teacher and all those professions kids blurt out when asked. I remember when it was my turn to be asked by my hot ( o sige na nga lovely na lang baka sabihin bata pa lang manyak na )teacher what i want to be, i replied, " gusto ko paglaki ko.....maging sa'yo" :P
"Jet, ba't malungkot ka? kanina ka pa tulala ah", my friend Becky worriedly asked, " yung nililigawan ko kasi, binasted ako nagtetextan lang naman kami"i said, "bakit naman? di ba type ka din nun? sweet nyo na nga ah? anu ba sinabi mo?", sabi ko miss ko siya and sana andito siya, un lang." "Patingin nga text mo" as she grabbed my mobile and checked the sent items... ( i ms u so matz, i wsh u wer her ) aus!
Naalala ko yung teacher ko nung grade school, si Ms. Aquino, sabi nya masama magsinungaling dapat honest kahit mistake mo para di magalit si God, sineryoso ko yun, lagi ako nagsasabi ng totoo, until accidentally ko nabasag yung antique vase ng nanay ko, dahil honest ako inamin ko na ako nakabasag, ayun, bali sa pwet ko yung hanger na kahoy, simula nun mas takot na ko sa nanay ko kesa kay god. :P
"Nakakainis!", Becky complained, " si mommy lagi chine check yung where abouts ni ate ako hindi! hmp!", i replied, " ayaw mo nun? free ka? pag lalaki nga at binata laging tinatanong ng magulang kung san ang punta, nung ikasal, yung asawa naman yung nagtatanong, hanggang sumakabilang buhay, yung mga nakikipaglibing tinatanong kung san mapupunta". (^_^)
"Alam mo Jet, puro ka palusot", Becky quipped, "sanay na sanay ka talaga', these words from Becky made me remember my 1st alibi; My Dad: bat late ka na umuwi? san ka galing? Jet: Pops, dami ko ginawa sa school, projects, events, meeting with groupmates, parang di ka naman naging estudyante. My Dad: anak, kinder ka pa lang... :p
After dinner at the same no. 1 fastfood chain in the country where more cows are dying, Becky proudly showed me her new toy, a 4th generation Ipod touch, " Ganda Becks! tara surf tayo" i said, " wait, tanong natin kung may wi-fi dito, excuse me kuya" (asking the dining crew ), "may wi-fi ba kayo?", " ay wala po mam. peach mango pie lang po", the crew answered, sheeesh!
Becky and I are having dinner at the no.1 fastfood chain in the country, i was full and all i wasn't able to finish my meal, seeing the leftover, Becky scolded me, "Jet, anukavah? sayang food, maraming nagugutom, di ka ba nakokonsensya?" smart assed i replied, " Becks pag inubos ko ba yan mabubusog yung mga nagugutom?".
2 reasons why nagho holding hands and couple sa mall, pag mag boyfriend at girlfriend pa lang, talagang sweet sila, pero pag mag asawa magka holding hands sa mall, hindi naman sila actually sweet, ayaw lang pakawalan ng lalaki si babae kase baka magshopping. (^_^)
Becky told me she had a dream, she woke up with 1 million beside her, " anong gagawin mo sa 1 million?" i asked, "bibili ng bagong car", smilingly she said, then asked me the same question, i answered " e di matutulog uli baka kasi maging 2 million". (^_^)
Becky and I exchanged gifts for the holidays: "Thanks Becks sa gift, here is yours", smiling a lot, she shook the box and asked " Jet what's this?", she saw a leak coming from the box, she tasted it and happily guessed, " hmm,, brandy?", worrying for the box's content i answered, " No Becks, it's a puppy".
Becky and i we're having some booze at their garden when a shooting star passes, " Uy! Jet, shooting star magwi wish ako! i wish, i wish.....", i sighed and asked her, "Nu ba winish mo? magka bf? pumayat? aba! baka maubos ang bituin sa langit!", now im seeing a lot of stars. (^_^)
After a quite a long hiatus, my friend Becky visited me in the studios: "Hi Jet!", she happily greeted and doing some model poses i guess, " i am slimmer na don't you think?" she said. Puzzled, i asked, " Nu ba ginagawa mong paglalaba at parang maliit o umurong yung suot mong damit? ", I think i busted my ear with that Banshee shriek of hers.
Girls are better than cars, they got 2 front horns, 2 back bumpers, self lubricating when hot, monthly automatic change oils, and the highest mileage of 9 months with just 2ml (^_^)
Here's another Becky story: I was at the school pergola when Becky arrived earlier than the usual (meaning always late), "Sup? you're early today?", i said. " Hi Jet!," she said smiling, "i'm changing things for the better na kase, one of them is my habitual tardiness", i really hate it kse when my prof called me "The Late Becky", parang namatay na ko e!
"Jet! look o?" blurted Becky with delight, "i have a pet dog!" i smiled, "san mo nakuha yan?", Bigay, name nya Bob, bigay kase ni mang Bob", she said, "kala ko Bob-oy," i teased, " ayan ka nanaman! o sige, creative ka di ba? ano name?" she smirked, " Blackie" i said, "Amf! white ito e! ba't blackie?" I answered smart assed, " Si Blackie, ang aso mong White!". (^_^)
I attended a mass with Becky's family, time to be holy and thank the Holy Chief for the blessings, midway the mass the priest said, " maghawak hawak tayo ng kamay at sabay sabay awitin ang ama namin", I hold her sexy ate's hand on my left (kilig) and Becky's on the right side, as she gave her hands for me to hold i said, "Hawak kamay daw, Inde paa!".
"Grabe! ang Inet talaga ngayon Jet!" Becky said as beads of perspiration lined her face, she pulled out something from her bag that resembles a bath towel," O? maliligo ka?", I said, " Hinde, bakit? nasa campus tayo eh!" she said, " ba't may tuwalya kang dala?" i asked, " Tadu ka talaga, bimpo lang ito!"
Me and Becky(let's call her Becky)were walking along the sidewalks of UST when a beggar approached us,"Te, Kuya, pangkain lng" We both believe giving alms is not the solution to poverty so i replied, " wala ngang makain eh, kta mo nglalakad na lng?", with a nasty grin, the beggar said," Ikw pde la makain, si ate mukhng busog na busog" . Becky said, " Kaw tlga! sna binigyan mo na lng, ginawa mo pa kng sinungaling!".
"Alam mo? minsan nasasaktan din ako sa biro mo", my chubby friend sobbed, "Sobrang sensitive ko na, kahit na anong bagay na marinig ko na nakaka relate sakin nasasaktan ako", I felt sad and apologized, " Churi naman friend, inet naman ulo mo inet na nga yung panahon inet pa ulo mo, speaking of mainit, inet dito sa garden, IM SWEATING LIKE A PIG! Whew!" now i have a broken jaw and i'll be eating oatmeal for a month.
My chubby friend asked me to visit her place coz she's lonely, i obliged ofcourse (syempre friend nga e), she opened the door and i greeted her with a high five, saw her dad and gave him a high five, her mom and her sexy ate with a kiss on the cheek, " bakit si ate and mommy kini kiss mo sa cheek, kami ni daddy high five?", i replied, " alangan naman mag kiss ako sa lalake?" Now i have to beg for a merienda.
"I'm really lucky Jet", My chubby friend said, "baket mo nasabi yan?" i asked, "Kse kahit malungkot ako palagi and down andyan ka to cheer me up kahit pangaasar lang", she replied while looking at me batting her eyelashes and pouting her lips, aghast and shocked at what i saw i snarled, " DON'T SCARE THE SHIT OUT OF ME!"
Inside the mall where many people spend their time to avoid the blistering heat, My same good old friend said,"Jet buti ka pa di mo ko ikinahihiya kasama kahit lagi mo akong inaasar", I removed my cap and long haired wig and fake moustache and the heavily tinted wide sunglasses off my face as i replied, " syempre hindi no? friends tayo eh!" then i put them all on back before someone recognizes me.
"Kailangan ko ng hobby Jet", My same old chubby friend said, "turuan mo ko mag gitara", i handed her a guitar and teached her, after awhile scratching her head, " di ko magawa A-chord, di kasya daliri ko sa fretboard", I handed her my Jazz bass, "Eto mag bass ka na lang, malalaki fret spaces kasya lahat ng daliri mo dyan".
While doing my guitar 101, my friend continued her self pity of a story, " Jet, hindi ko maintindihan, yung mommy and daddy ko, payat, yung ate ko, payat din and sexy pa, ako lang ang naiiba, taba na pangit pa, minsan naiisip ko ampon ako e, o di kaya black sheep", i replied, " Ampon? di naman siguro anu ka ba? black sheep? hmmmm....Inde rin! masyadong maliit yung tupa para syo, baka o kalabaw pwede."
Standing in front of a huge mirror, my friend sighed heavily (pati ba naman buntong hininga heavy?) and blurted,"ang taba ko na nga, ang bansot pa ko, amf!", as a good friend, (nanaman daw), i replied, "kapatid, don't feel bad about your SHORTCOMINGS", namutla ako nung umusok yung ilong. (^_^)
At the mall's food court, while pigging on a box of pizza and a gallon of ice cream my friend continued her story, " Nung bata ako ang dami daming naku kyutan sa akin, pero baket ngayon wala na?" The gatorade im drinking almost shoot out of my nostrils, i replied, " Kapatid, Ang definition ng cute ay maliit, cute=maliit, may malaki bang cute?", I ended up paying the bills because of that comment. (^_^)
While inside a mall, my friend somewhat forgot her woes when a demo girl greeted us, "Hi ma'am, try nyo po itong product namen", she answered, " ano ba yan?", the girl replied, "ma'am slimming tea po, guaranteed na pampapayat after giving birth po, effective po ito ma'am, try nyo, siguradong matutuwa si mister", sarcastically she snapped, " Di pa nga ako naje Jer jer, nakapanganak na? amf ka!".
My friend and I were walking in a park when we saw a well with lots of coins at the bottom of it, " Uy! Jet, wishing well! teka may coin pa ko dito, magwi wish ako na magka boyfriend!", I replied, "Sandali, ipapalit natin tong one thousand peso bill mo sa coins tapos ihulog mo lahat sa well para magkatotoo wish mo.".......Ayun! muntik na ko ilaglag sa well. (^_^)
The same friend asked me a favor if i could make her portfolio since i'm a photographer, as always, im always there for a friend in need , so i did make her portfolio, upon seeing her photos, she sighed and asked: "Jet, parang obvious na mataba ako dito, di ba kaya mo papayatin ito ?", smart assed i replied, "Kapatid, Photographer ako hindi doctor." = )
The same friend continued her lament: "Jet ikaw? do you find me attractive?" now feeliing uneasy my tongue slipped, " Nag vegetarian na kase ako 5 days ago. "
The same friend asked: "Jet, do you think mataba ako kaya walang naa attract sakin?", trying to be cautious with my reply i answered, " sus! hinde no! maliit lang sayo yung damit mo. (^_^)
A friend confided: "Hanggang ngayon wala pa din akong partner, Jet tell me, Panget ba ako?", of course as a friend i tried to lift her spirit up, " Darating din sya, Tandaan mo, lahat ng kaldero may kasamang takip", with her arched brows she retorted, " Bakit Jet? Mukha ba kong kaldero?". (^_^)
